Basic Blog Etiquette or should that be Eti-QUIET YOU!

Here is an old excerpt I rediscovered from a principled piece about upstanding blog etiquette just after I started out in this game. Shame I’ve since already given my wagging tongue of opinion free reign – ah crepe & bogger. Anyhow can’t hurt to sneak a peak of a time when I once held such lofty ambition:

  • All me-blog posts will be thoroughly self edited & lampooned (see brackets-ed.) <=Wahey look I’m at it already. This will save face in appearing dissimilar to the Daily Mail’s website comments & mental nutjobs who overly capitalise/take everything to heart/repeatedly use Christian names to forcibly engage with their peers etc.
  • Said posts will try wherever possible to refrain from casting assumptions about their readership; in other words projecting too much casual opinion as if this were preordained common knowledge (please refer to Hollywood bastion of studious docu-grams of attitudes towards xenophobia within the education system entitled ‘Slap her, she’s French!’ for the archetypal case study).
  • As you should soon discover, I happen to find my own life rather non-enthralling so extracts will be thoroughly peppered with tangents, irreverent & regressive humour, blatant forgery/plagiarism of ideas expressed far better through previous film/music/literature/comedy serials/Chinese finger puppet theatre/animal noises.
  • Under penalty of online suicide all entries will exclude the following adjectives: wacky, zany, crrrazy, super loopy (except in the context of Chas & Dave’s ‘Snooker loopy nuts are we’) and batty actually no not batty I may require that in other posts being a mammal lover (take that as you will with a pinch of soil) and being into dub reggae/ragga possibly quoting slanderous homophobic lyrics.

Closing statement: many blogs appear to have nonexistent or very blinkered literature reviews in this personalised tech-xtualised age. The more established seem to only source other blog references so may I take this opportunity to declare that I wish to return to Orwell’s ‘Why I Write’ for the birth of purpose & reason in a craft that no amount of tech-savy ‘malcontent over content’ will disguise a lack thereof.

Now that I read it back to myself it seems I’ve already compromised most of my principles for the sake of progress in having recruited 2 subscribers! Selling out one page viewing at a time; ah well, you’ll always reassure me won’t you oh inner conscience of increasingly strained desperation?

"It finally happened"

This best sums up how I currently feel about my career & life in general...


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